2007 Tahoe Won't Stop Cranking
 

Ok so this is the 3rd time this mofo has left me stuck in the past week and I'm about to retire it, viking style, in an inferno. Here's the low down of my issues as of late. Issue began in early April, at the post office. Drove there to check my box, came out to a no cranking hoe. Checked the fuse, it was blown. Replace the fuse, thankfully Oreillys was directly across the street, aaaaaaaaaand blow that one too. Pull out my trusty dusty starter button, it goes with me everywhere, and it busts off no problem. Figure it is something with the starter, buy a new one and presto magnifico the thing lives again! Until... Last week. At the gym, drive up there noooooo problemo. Everything is just hunky dory, come out and pop goes the fuse-o! Lucky me, Walmart is around the corner from the gym so I go buy some more fuses and had them things popping like popcorn. Burned every one up. Had to pony up for a wrecker to get it to my job, where I am blessed to have a lift and helpers, got her flying in the air and see that the starter trigger wire was grounding out on the dipstick. One replaced wire later, she lives once more! Until the following day, Friday of last week. Where, in true hoe fashion, she left me stuck at the gym. Again. Now mind you, I'm not exactly a dumb fella but I have my dumb moments. Figured "Well, if I can jump the starter with my starter button, I should be able to jump it at the fuse box too." It was 4 in the morning and I have ZERO light in the sticks where I live. Well... I should have known better, and I learned my lesson. One smoked fuse box later, had to replace that as well. Along with the starter because after that incident I noticed that brand spanking new starters solenoid was loose, like really lose. One warranty starter later, and a new fuse box, I get it all installed and... Right out the box, the starter is roaring. Kinda like a Ford, just obnoxiously loud. I start it a few times and on the 3rd time, yes I was counting, you can hear the starter grinding. Not against the flywheel, but internally. Soooo I say screw it, leave it there until the next day and attack it then. It was already late anyways. Next day I'm up bright and early, bum a ride to my shop on my off day, and get to taking that starter off AGAIN. This time, I go to my wrecked 2007 Tahoe (that's what happens when you loan it out to friends) and pull the starter off of it, because I'm convinced at this point I am getting crap starters, albeit brand new ones from GM. Get that starter off, get the roaring one off my daily and I notice the starter cable coming from the driver side battery is pretty heavily frayed, so I figure that is the source of all my fuse popping issues and while I am underneath it I just go ahead and snippy snippy the frayed part off, get a new cable end for it, crimp it on (with a fairly large hammer and the correct battery cable crimping tool), and heat shrink the end as to insulate any possible stray copper strands that may have slipped out and... presto magnifico again the creature is alive! Until... Today... Something told me not to go to the gym at 4 this morning so, I rolled over and killed my alarm and went back to bed. Got up, did my morning stuff, went to start the hoe so I could fuel her up and head in to work and... It cranks. And cranks. And cranks. And cranks. It doesn't stop. At all. Turn the key to the off position and it still cranks, so in a frenzy I scramble to pop the hood, and proceed to yanking the driver side battery cable off, try my damndest to get the passenger side battery cable off and my weak ass can't. Scrambling for tools now, it takes almost 3 minutes to find what I need in my box, funny how when you need it you can never find it, and get the passenger battery cable off and successfully kill the starter. That being said, pretty sure the starter is smoked, smelled burning something and saw some lovely smoke, wouldn't rule out the trigger wire, nor the battery cables going down to the starter either. Now. All that being said, what in the sam hell could be going on? I am at a loss completely on this one, and my right hand to the sky if it happens again I am going to shove this thing into the street and set it ablaze. My suspicion is hiding in the ignition switch, since it didn't cut off with the key. OR the starter cable coming from the battery somehow still arcing over to the trigger wire and it might be shorted somewhere else? I'm not exactly a slouch when it comes to these things but... I am frustrated and my mind is not here right now. Any help would be incredibly appreciated.

Wait until I finish reading "War and Peace".

i cant even try reading, i hate reading books