I left the lights on and I'm trying to figure out how exactly to jumpstart this thing with the battery in where it is. I also have this red cap over the positive diode. How the hell do I remove the cap and jumpstart the thing? Doesnt seem like jumper cables can fit in there that tight...

 

See if you can get the red cable on the battery and ground the black cable to the frame. The red cap thats on the battery will either screw off or slide off the battery post.